sex isn’t just three letters strung together; it’s a word loaded with questions, silence, myths, guilt, desire, wonder, and fear. For something that is definitely so natural, it’s truly amazing how uncomfortable people still get talking about it. Maybe that’s part of the problem.

Why is there so much taboo around sex?

We grow up hearing half-truths or nothing at all. Some people are warned to “stay away” from intercourse like it’s a danger zone. Others are thrown into it without ever being told what healthy intimacy even looks like. So many of us end up navigating this part of life with maps we never got to read. But at its core, it is just human. Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it’s beautiful. Sometimes it’s awkward. Sometimes it’s healing.

And yes, sometimes it’s disappointing. But it’s real. It’s physical, emotional, mental. It’s more than just bodies. It’s about trust. Vulnerability. Feeling safe, feeling wanted, feeling enough. Nobody tells you that at first. You’re supposed to figure it out on your own. Piece by piece. Movie by movie. Comment section by comment section. And let’s be honest; most of that? It’s nonsense. Unrealistic, exaggerated, and honestly kind of damaging. It turns something deeply personal into a performance. Into pressure.

What’s never hyped up enough?

Communication. Consent. Listening. Laughing when something weird happens. Checking in. And here’s the wildest part: everyone is faking confidence. Everyone. People in their twenties, thirties, or forties; they’re still figuring it out. Because it’s not something you master. It shifts. It changes with age, with experience, with who you’re with. With what you’ve been through. There’s no “right” timeline. No perfect number. No gold star for performance. No rulebook that works for everyone. Some people want it often, some don’t. Some explore early, some later, some not at all. And none of that defines your worth. It isn’t a competition. It’s not a checklist.

 It’s not owed, and it’s not something to be ashamed of either. It should come with care. With self-awareness. With choice. And sure, sex is tied to pleasure. That matters. But also to identity. To connection. To memory. And sometimes, to pain. That’s okay. That’s human. What we really need isn’t more sensationalism. It’s more true. More space to say, “Hey, I don’t know everything,” or “I have questions,” or “This matters to me for reasons I can’t explain yet.” Because when we talk about it in a real way, without shame, without filters, we take away the fear and give people space to just be human. Imperfect. Curious. Honest. Maybe that’s where the real intimacy starts.